I am trying to let go of things that are out of my control. I really am. But oh my God they’re driving me crazy! It would be different if people would stop bringing stuff to me. They know I am a fixer, doer, motherer, etc. If you present me with a problem, I usually have a solution. That is who I am. Now if I only had all these solutions for my own life…I’m working on it, though.
I have a friend who is going through a divorce who needed me to help her with something. She wanted me to help yesterday. I was in the middle of finishing stuff for school. Did I tell you I’m back in school at 50? No? Well, I am. So she wanted me to drop everything for her crisis and help her and her new boyfriend. No. I told her they could have my assistance today. What does she do today about 20 minutes before time to meet up? Sends a text saying “never mind! we don’t want to bother you.” I’m sorry, but you bothered me about it multiple times yesterday and a few times today. Could you not have given me more notice?
Another friend that I have been helping with social media…she is going to use the last of what little patience I have left. I told her she needed to put a friendly post about something she needs on a group we are in on FB. What does she do? Puts a post up like an ISO ad. Nothing friendly. I sent her a long message explaining the protocol of the group and told her to fix the post. She is going to end up pissing off a bunch of people who are her target audience.
I realize a large part of this is my fault. I get it! But honest to God I don’t know how to turn it off. I’m in therapy and still haven’t figured this shit out.
- What makes me a drama magnet?
- Why do I feel the need to help?
- Will it ever stop?
- Why do I get so angry?
These are questions I ask myself all the time. Ohhh…and why can I fix their shit but not my own? Well, I did say I am working on that and I really am. I have started asking myself, “what would you tell someone else to do?” and it usually works. And sometimes I follow my own advice! And it works!
Are any of you like this? What do you do?
anonymous real thoughts 