I have been making life changes since the beginning of the year. I decided this was going to be my year. It feels weird. Last year I was so unhappy. I was at a point where nothing sounded good and living just hurt. I am now at a point where I am learning that life can be good and it is OK to laugh and smile. I like being spoken to as an adult who matters. I like having a man think that I am smart, funny, sexy and lots of other things. I like that my body is changing and that I turn other men’s heads from time to time. The other day I must have been having a good day because I sent Alabama a selfie and he said he nearly fell off his seat, another man wouldn’t quit staring as I walked across the parking lot and there was more than one double-take. I’m a middle-aged woman and that does something for the ego. I won’t lie…I checked the mirror to see if there was a booger or something. I was like WTF?
I think all of these changes really have done something for my ego, though. I don’t walk into a place and look at the floor anymore. I look straight ahead or wherever else I might want to look. If I catch someone’s eyes accidentally, I don’t act ashamed. I walk with more confidence. That sounds odd I know but I take long strides now.
Yesterday as I was driving, there was a little snarl and I needed out of the mess. If I could exit, it would fix the whole thing. Well men were everywhere. I looked at all them and kinda shrugged like “Please?” and they all graciously parted for me to get through and all smiled and waved. Do you think that the woman from last year would have done that? No. She would have backed up and tried something else. This woman just went right through it and the problem was solved. I waved at all of them and kept going.