I remember getting my first period at age thirteen. It was scary and exciting. I was a woman! Boy was I naive. Really naive.
Throughout the years there has been frustration over painful periods, no periods, pregnancy scares, PCOS and period fluctuations. I’m at a point where I’ve noticed changes gradually. It’s scarier than beginning my period. I’m not upset that I’m possibly at the beginning of the end of my season of fertility. I gave up on having kids years ago. What I’m scared of is hot flashes, mood swings and the unpredictability of it all.
Most women have their mothers to ask about this. My mother died 17 years ago. My self-adopted mother just passed away. I do have some aunts I can ask but it feels weird. I have felt alone so many times and this is another one of those times. Menopause isn’t funny or comfortable.
I have to go for that yearly visit to confirm my suspicion of perimenopause or full fledged menopause. Men, be glad you’re not a woman.