I have had a lot of negative feelings about the way my life has been going. It has made me anxious, hopeless and depressed. I have finally gotten to the point where I just can’t stand things the way they are.
Work is the main source of my discomfort. I have worked my ass off. Well, not literally. Actually I have gained a lot of weight due to the depression and frustration. As an example of the amount of work I have done, during the month of August I literally had 3 whole days off for a 31 day period. Yes, you read that correctly. My boss hasn’t cared that I am burnt out. In fact I think the boss is actually punishing me for some imagined misdeed.
The good news about this bullshit? I am actively seeking new employment. I can’t stand this life. It is driving me to the point where I cry driving to work. I am anxious at work because I am never sure when the boss is going to start some negative interaction.
I have had some interviews recently and they were very positive. I actually had a job offer that I am unsure about. I am almost desperate to say, “Yes!” But I don’t trust it. It’s involved in print media and I just don’t feel that is a good choice because the job has no benefits and I need insurance. I also feel that print media is dying. Most people are moving toward digital. I also interviewed with another company that seems like a good environment. I like that they invested money to do a personality assessment for the position that was intense. The test also was dead on. I will know in a few days if I make it to round 2.
The other issue of going…I have applied for jobs out-of-state. I have been selected to test for 2 really good jobs. The problem is that it’s 300 miles to the state and I don’t have time off from work. These positions are really good. But I am questioning this because I don’t have a place to live and right now my credit is crappy. I also am not ready to see some of my family and friends. I am concerned about the timing. I applied without the belief that I would be chosen at all. I wonder whether I should call in sick to work and make a 24 hour, 600 mile trip for 2 tests?
I am confused. I am frustrated. I am ready for a change.